It's Been A While

Looking back at my last post, I was startled to see that it was dated in 2010! I remember blogging throughout my ISTE Capstone Certification, but I was surprised to see just how much I had documented. What feels very strange is that I have been out of any classroom since spring of 2012 when I began staying home with my then 10 month old. Now she is seven, in second grade, and away from me all day, every day. It feels like it all went by in a very quick blink.

When I made what was a very complicated decision to leave education for full time motherhood, I believed I would never feel the push to return to the classroom. Why would I want to return to the workforce when I had to opportunity to stay home, care for my family, and fill my time with whatever my heart desired? Yet here I am, suddenly craving a real schedule, craving a school building, and most surprisingly craving the language arts middle school classroom.

A fellow colleague put it best when I expressed all of this to her: "I know that feeling... being in a school is this weird sense of team and belonging and family. You don't want to admit it until you miss it. And all of a sudden you want to do crazy hair day!"

I couldn't agree more, and I've been wondering what it is about the teacher life that I've been missing, and I think that sense of belonging and team is a big part of it. I also miss the brain work that comes with being a teacher. I miss synthesizing information, I miss reflecting, I miss being creative and putting together meaningful activities. I miss the students.

I've had this feeling a few times over the past year since my daughter started full day school, but I always talked myself out of the idea. Did I really want to add that stress to my family when we are fortunately comfortable on one income? Did I want to engage in the morning hustle of getting everyone out of the door on time? Did I want to rethink our lives? The answer was always a quick and short "no". But suddenly it doesn't feel so distasteful, so I'm taking the first steps and working towards getting my license current. What happens after that? I'm not sure, but I'm excited at the prospects.